Showing posts with label crowds. Show all posts
Showing posts with label crowds. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 04, 2023

TUESDAY, MEETING DAY

 PREFACE

My sister is in two groups which have meetings regularly. I don't join clubs or groups or associations. I'm not a joiner. I hate things done by committee. I had to be IN some groups due to my job as a teacher/instructor but I wouldn't have invited most of the members to my home, or been friends with them if I hadn't had to. It's not like I haven't tried some groups willingly.

STORY

Before I had my incident causing PTSD, depression and anxiety, I could minge with the best of them. I have always been "shy" but made myself overcome that so I didn't get pushed around. I stood up for myself. I gave class reports. I took public speaking which helped when I became a Boy Scout Leader, a Webelos Leader, and eventually, The Cub Scout Pack Leader. I got the BEST leadership training in the Boy Scouts. All this prepared me for being a college instructor/professor. I could stand up in front of 15-30 students and lecture. I could stand up in front of a whole gathering of professors at meetings. I still didn't like to but I COULD. 

Back to joining groups. I never liked not being the leader in groups. I also didn't like the responsibility of having to lead and make all the decisions in a group. I've been an artist all my life but I can't deal with artist groups. I think it's maybe because I think that most of the other artists are really full of themselves. And there are so many people out there that if given a little bit of power, they let it go to their heads and spoil everything for everyone else.

CONCLUSION

Now that I have anxiety about groups (along with PTSD), it will be a long time (if ever) before I will consider joining any group or club or guild. Although I am in a "guild" in my online game and I chat with people from all over the country and the world. I don't have to be in the same room with them though, and that makes all the difference. We cope how we cope.