ONLINE DATING SCAM (PART 2)

 PREFACE

This unfolded like several other online dating contact scams. The men establish regular contact and language that advances intimacy. They reveal personal tragedies of losing a beloved wife, having to care for the motherless child (usually female), and traveling for business a lot. They have some kind of weird career. An engineer on oil rigs in the Black Sea. A geologist working in Iraq. And now a cyber security and military equipment exporter/supplier.

STORY

Chapter Two: Daily texts

He texted me in the morning to wake me up with sweet sentiments and encouragement. He texted me several times throughout the day ending up with a late night "good night, my queen" to segway into the next morning. They learn that constant contact keeps the "fish on the hook" and makes the connection be on a deeper level. "The better to reel you in, my dear." Klump professed his "love" for me WAY, WAY too soon. I kept him at "arms length" with vague feelings for him. I never said I loved him or even that I trusted him (in so many words) but gave him just enough to move forward.

Then came the "trip out of town" and he was heading to Mexico for a big deal that would make him enough money to retire. BTW, he listed himself as living in Miami. So flying to Mexico did not sound too suspicious. We kept in touch daily while he was in Mexico. I pushed a little bit on the "when are you coming home" question after he'd been there for two weeks. He said he'd be flying out within a few days.

Chapter three: THE BIG SCAM

He texted that he had finished his business but there was a problem with him getting paid. Then there was a problem with him getting out of the country. The Mexican police had confiscated his "check" and wouldn't let him leave unless he paid them (which all his money was in the "check"). They were arresting him and putting him in jail. Really?! And they let you keep your phone?! And why would a legit company cut you a check for 10s of thousands of dollars? Why not just transfer the money EFT? Why couldn't he cash the check and wire the money to himself? I had so many questions and he had excuses but not answers. Then the request that I send him money. I told him I could not do that. He said that he would be put in a Mexican jail (wasn't he already in one?!) and that his business manager couldn't do anything for him. That his bank couldn't do anything for him. Right.

So I texted him that I had an FBI neighbor/friend across the street that would make inquiries about his situation if he gave me the details. He said please don't involve the FBI. That's when he fessed up and said that his business transaction wasn't exactly legit. HE WAS SELLING GUNS AND AMUNITION IN MEXICO!! A gun runner! WOW. What a tale we weave.... I said that I couldn't do anything for him. That he needed to lose my information and not contact me anymore. He begged me to help him. I said no. I blocked his texts and had no more contact with him.

CONCLUSION

At least this time I didn't fall for ANY of his BS. The nagging inconsistency in the back of my mind persisted. "You've seen this before." I HAVE seen this before. I've seen it way too many times. I am an incurable optimist but this is leading to the cure!

The first time I was taken in by an online dating scammer, was about a year after my husband died and I had been online for about 6 months just trying to find companionship. I was missing male companionship. I "met" a guy online that strung me along for SIX weeks who worked on "an oil rig in the Black Sea." He sent me pictures of the rig! Pictures of the rig in a massive storm. He had a daughter in Miami that was living with his mother while he was out of the country working. He actually sent me a cashier's check because he couldn't get back without me buying him an airline ticket home! And I deposited it & waited for it to clear (totally bogus check that the BANK accepted & then it totally screwed up my bank account!).

It has been 18 years since then. I have had countless attempts since then to scam me through my heart. The scams have evolved but are recognizable if you know what to look for. Too many "red flags" to go into on this post but look for it in the future. Stay safe out there and if it seems to good to be true...it's not true!