ONLINE DATING SCAM (PART 2)

 PREFACE

This unfolded like several other online dating contact scams. The men establish regular contact and language that advances intimacy. They reveal personal tragedies of losing a beloved wife, having to care for the motherless child (usually female), and traveling for business a lot. They have some kind of weird career. An engineer on oil rigs in the Black Sea. A geologist working in Iraq. And now a cyber security and military equipment exporter/supplier.

STORY

Chapter Two: Daily texts

He texted me in the morning to wake me up with sweet sentiments and encouragement. He texted me several times throughout the day ending up with a late night "good night, my queen" to segway into the next morning. They learn that constant contact keeps the "fish on the hook" and makes the connection be on a deeper level. "The better to reel you in, my dear." Klump professed his "love" for me WAY, WAY too soon. I kept him at "arms length" with vague feelings for him. I never said I loved him or even that I trusted him (in so many words) but gave him just enough to move forward.

Then came the "trip out of town" and he was heading to Mexico for a big deal that would make him enough money to retire. BTW, he listed himself as living in Miami. So flying to Mexico did not sound too suspicious. We kept in touch daily while he was in Mexico. I pushed a little bit on the "when are you coming home" question after he'd been there for two weeks. He said he'd be flying out within a few days.

Chapter three: THE BIG SCAM

He texted that he had finished his business but there was a problem with him getting paid. Then there was a problem with him getting out of the country. The Mexican police had confiscated his "check" and wouldn't let him leave unless he paid them (which all his money was in the "check"). They were arresting him and putting him in jail. Really?! And they let you keep your phone?! And why would a legit company cut you a check for 10s of thousands of dollars? Why not just transfer the money EFT? Why couldn't he cash the check and wire the money to himself? I had so many questions and he had excuses but not answers. Then the request that I send him money. I told him I could not do that. He said that he would be put in a Mexican jail (wasn't he already in one?!) and that his business manager couldn't do anything for him. That his bank couldn't do anything for him. Right.

So I texted him that I had an FBI neighbor/friend across the street that would make inquiries about his situation if he gave me the details. He said please don't involve the FBI. That's when he fessed up and said that his business transaction wasn't exactly legit. HE WAS SELLING GUNS AND AMUNITION IN MEXICO!! A gun runner! WOW. What a tale we weave.... I said that I couldn't do anything for him. That he needed to lose my information and not contact me anymore. He begged me to help him. I said no. I blocked his texts and had no more contact with him.

CONCLUSION

At least this time I didn't fall for ANY of his BS. The nagging inconsistency in the back of my mind persisted. "You've seen this before." I HAVE seen this before. I've seen it way too many times. I am an incurable optimist but this is leading to the cure!

The first time I was taken in by an online dating scammer, was about a year after my husband died and I had been online for about 6 months just trying to find companionship. I was missing male companionship. I "met" a guy online that strung me along for SIX weeks who worked on "an oil rig in the Black Sea." He sent me pictures of the rig! Pictures of the rig in a massive storm. He had a daughter in Miami that was living with his mother while he was out of the country working. He actually sent me a cashier's check because he couldn't get back without me buying him an airline ticket home! And I deposited it & waited for it to clear (totally bogus check that the BANK accepted & then it totally screwed up my bank account!).

It has been 18 years since then. I have had countless attempts since then to scam me through my heart. The scams have evolved but are recognizable if you know what to look for. Too many "red flags" to go into on this post but look for it in the future. Stay safe out there and if it seems to good to be true...it's not true!

ONLINE DATING 2021: THE LAST SCAM

PREFACE

I QUIT!

Okay. Here's the story of the last month. In "chapters" because it's a long story. It is a cautionary tale for single women everywhere. Pay Attention!

I have been using online dating services since 2003. Yes, the beginning of the whole thing. I was a new widow then. I had been out of the "dating" scene for 20 years. A lot changes in two decades, but not as much as those particular decades. 1982-2002 saw many leaps in technology, communications, internet access, social media, and innovative scam artists.

STORY

Chapter One: First Contact

We connected through Tinder. He was a widow. I was a widow. He was originally from South Africa. A white South African who immigrated to California in 2009, where he met his wife. She died 3 years later of cancer, leaving him with a two year old daughter. His daughter died of colon cancer in December 2020. He blames the doctors and their preoccupation with the pandemic for not giving her the "best" treatment and allowing her to die.

He is an independent contractor in cyber-security and military grade security equipment. His name. Klump Williams. He was going by William on the Tinder sight but once we moved over to texting on the phone, he revealed his true name and said I could call him either. I said I preferred his real name and called him Klump. We "met" on May 5th, 2021. He sent VERY long-winded texts, very unlike typical men. He made enough English grammar/spelling mistakes for it to be his second language. He sent pictures of his 2 dogs and 3 cats, relaxing with him on the couch. Also many more endearing poses supposedly sent in "real time." He was quite handsome.

He then started texting me several times a day, every day. He professed his "love" for me. And asked that I trust him, "why can't I trust him?", and saying I was the first woman he'd contacted. Klump hadn't dated in 9 years?! *suspicious*

CONCLUSION

This is what they do. They say all the right things. Agree to text to get to know you. Don't push an in-person meeting. Post appealing pictures that cater to info on your profile. I really thought this one might be a REAL person. A man I could like. A man I could become friends with and possibly more. But as the following chapters will reveal, that was not the case. Even in the first texts, on Tinder, I had that nagging inconsistency in the back of my mind. "You've seen this before." To be continued....

SPRING FORWARD 2013

 

PREFACE

This is a "memory" post from Facebook that came up today. I figured I'd publish it here and now, just to keep it alive in my blog, if not in my mind.

STORY

MARCH 10, 2013:

I am immobile on the couch, with my computer next to me, listening to Spotify radio based on 80s music (Don Henley specifically), my marigolds sitting outside in the dark waiting for me to come out and "finish already!"...my stomach growling, and I really need to go to bed early tonight to take my car in to be worked on at 8AM! I love that the time has sprung forward but I wish I hadn't stayed out partying until 2AM and witnessed the change! (No, I really don't...I had a good time!)

I'm not complaining, just wondering what to do next. I guess I'll put away my gardening stuff for tomorrow...eat something relatively healthy...NOT watch "Rock of Ages" tonight...play a little Gardens of Time...go to bed & set my alarm. I really hate waking up by an alarm (so unnatural).

CONCLUSION

I remember what it was like to live alone. To have a house to myself. To be accountable to no one. I'm not sure if I was teaching at this time in the year of 2013. My last classes were taught in August of 2013. So spring semester might have been over, but probably not, since we usually ended classes at the end of April, beginning of May (then graduation at the end of May). I really miss teaching.

THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE COVID-19 TUNNEL: WEEK 52!

  PREFACE

Today I received my first shot of Moderna vaccine! It was uneventful and so far, I'm not experiencing any effects. Not even a sore arm. In 28 days, I receive my second shot and will be vaccinated against contracting COVID-19. 

STORY

There hasn't been enough time passed to be sure for how long the vaccination will protect. But at this time, it is recommended that we all get vaccinated yearly, just like the regular flu vaccine. I have never been one to get the flu vaccine due to the mutations yearly and the vaccine not protecting from the new strains. Since the pandemic, I've had time to rethink that opinion. I think once I'm clear of the timeframe, I'll get the flu vaccine and the pneumonia vaccine (good for 10 years!).

My being overweight got me the shot when being under 65 did not. I'm 64 and 5 months! I do have asthmatic bronchitis. I do have high blood pressure (if they bothered to take my BP with an automatic cuff), eventho I don't take meds for it. I control it with celery juice (when I think of juicing). My blood pressure is notable due to being 100 lbs overweight! Normally, when I'm within a normal weight range, it's so low they have to take it twice to make sure I'm alive! My blood sugar also runs low (with a father and paternal grandmother who both had Type 2 diabetes). I am usually in good health. I take many homeopathic vitamins and supplements to stay that way. I regularly take sodium bicarbonate (baking soda) which lowers my body's acidity. Turmeric every day to help thin my blood (no blood clots or strokes).

CONCLUSION

I try to do all I can to stay healthy, except exercise. I have been WAY TOO sedentary. I just brought my Gazelle (exercise equipment) down from my storage unit. I haven't cleared a spot in my room for it yet so I can use it, but it's a start. I'm closer to adding more movement to my daily life. Let's hope I can maintain the momentum. There is a light at the end of this long, dark COVID-19 tunnel for me. I have been housebound for longer than most. Only going out to pickup takeout or groceries (already shopped and bagged for me at WalMart or Publix). The shot was only the second time I've been in Publix in the past 11 months! I stopped doing my vendor work (mystery shopping) last June. I will be delighted to be able to go out again, even if it will be with a mask for as long as necessary!