FIFTY SHADES OF SEXUAL HARASSMENT

PREFACE
I have encountered sexual harassment at many levels throughout my life. I have not always recognized it as such at the time. Sometimes I realized it right after it happened, after thinking about it for some time (days, weeks, months, even years), and sometimes never realizing it until relating a story about it and someone else pointing it out. How odd is that?

STORY
I was working in a 7-Eleven on Saturday, setting up a display for the coming Christmas season. This store was the 15th location I had completed in the past six days. I work from a seated position as my lower back cannot take the bending and stooping required. I take my two-step A-frame step ladder with me and use it to sit on and get to lower levels and bottom rows.

A customer came in and walked over to me, standing behind me, he reached around leaning into my back to "reach for something" hanging on the display. I could smell the strong odor of Listerine (used to mask alcohol, as it triggered a memory of my alcoholic father). As I turned to see if I recognized him, he said something apologetic, giggled and walked away. Maybe this was his idea of flirting?

He then returned and leaned in behind me to give me a hug (of sorts), again feigning that he was going to buy something off the display I was setting up. Both his arms encircling me at just below shoulder height. Held only long enough as to not make me too uncomfortable. He said, "You know I'm just kidding around. I'm a regular in here," and then walked away again. Minutes later, he returned with a single rose bought from the counter as he checked out. He said, "For you, for putting up with me messing around. It's just that I hadn't seen you in here before. See you later." To which I replied, "You probably won't see me later, as I don't work here. But thanks for the flower."

CONCLUSION
As I reflected on the whole experience, I started to get creeped out. What he had done was sexual harassment at the least, sexual assault at the worst. He invaded my space. Touched me (a stranger) without permission, twice! And then gave me with a present to apologize for his actions. It had made me uncomfortable. He had had the positional advantage of standing while I was sitting. He had approached me from behind with no warning, both times, and had made the second encounter more intimate than the first. It was creepy.

While walking on the sidewalk or riding my bike, I have been sexually harassed by men on the side of the road or from moving vehicles, cat-calling; bosses making advances; customers being inappropriate while I worked as a server; and at least one incident of misjudging a sexual encounter. But not until recently, with all the "outing" of sexual predators, would I have taken notice of this brief encounter as an incident of sexual harassment. All the other times were when I was younger, slimmer, prettier, and I dealt with them as accepted behavior (as Weinstein's actions were accepted but not acceptable behavior). I have always thought it was disgusting but "it happens all the time." I am glad that this behavior is being called on to be accountable. That men need to realize that what they think is flirting, IS NOT. That it is NOT acceptable to invade someone's space or touch their body without permission. ESPECIALLY IF THEY ARE A STRANGER! Geez! Men need to be re-trained in the art of social contact.

AND FALL IS UPON US

PREFACE
Good thoughts. Think of how you want your life to be and it will be. Thought becomes reality. I am really losing patience. Had a birthday, lost my job, may lose my home, car is in need of repair, haven't seen family all summer, NO dating prospects...

STORY
The weather is turning cooler, thank Mother Nature for that! It is a glorious time of year to be outside and to work in my gardens. I have three raised flower gardens in the front of the house and one veggie/herb garden in the back. The water from the well has quit twice now...very late this year for it to be short on water...hmmm. Got 23 plants on Friday from Lowe's, for $24! Such a deal!! Now I have to plant them before they wilt and die. I have been wanting some Cannas to plant and most of them are...some red flowers, some with variegated-striped leaves, some with dark coloring under the leaves...beautiful. And they were going to throw them away!!

I got notice that the house I am living in and have lived in for 4 years is going to be judged for a final foreclosure decision on Dec. 6, 2013. My backdoor neighbor said that even after that, it may be several months before any action against me takes place. I am expecting a miracle.

I haven't heard anything from the college about me teaching in the spring as yet. The schedule came out on November 1st and even if I'm not listed, they should know if they are going to bring me in to teach. I live for teaching, love it so much, and I don't know what to do when I'm not teaching. Teaching is what I am meant to do.

My health has suffered at my own hands. I have been idle for SIX months and my body is showing me that this has to be reversed or I am headed for trouble. My muscle tone is gone, my hip joints hurt...not to mention the increased pain in my knees and back, and I'm starting to look and feel my age. What a horror!! This is not how I want to be. I can change this. Exercise. I have lost 20lbs.

CONCLUSION
Get up, get moving, DO SOMETHING...build the life I want. Peace & Joy!

SELF IMPROVEMENT

PREFACE
As human beings we strive to improve ourselves. It's a basic need to reach self-actualizaiton or what some call enlightenment. Take into consideration that there is an enormous population of humans that will never reach enlightenment because they live in horrendous conditions where ignorance is the rule, to keep the masses controllable. In a country like ours, this should not be, but unfortunately it does exist. Mazlow's Heirarchy of Needs shows that self-actualization can only happen when all the other needs are met. The deficiency needs, of which self esteem is just below self-actualization, have to be met before moving on to the next level. With our tough economic times, self esteem has taken a hit.

STORY
There is a plethora of self improvement systems out there.
The Law of Attraction. This particular idea is so evident and easy to understand that most don't get it. It is based on breaking habits of negativity and thinking your way into a better life. Good thoughts attract good things. Believing the you are already at the place you want to be, things are already taken care of, and eliminating worry from your life.
Visualizing is closely related. As something that very successful people from all walks of life have testified to, visualization works. An athlete crossing the finish line is never surprised that they won, because they already saw themselves doing it. It is something that many people have to practice in the beginning. Vision Boards and Dream Posters were the first visual representation of what you want, your goals. Now there are MindMovies which gives free generic movies which uses visual images and music which taps into brain frequencies to align the mind and the brain. You see what you want and your mind is receptive. Or you can create your own specific mindmovie to manifest your dreams.
Motivational tapes and seminars to help you through your self improvement. Motivating people to get out of their own way in becoming successful in their lives, in getting a better life, and finding their true calling. Many of these will involve making money or providing a steady income. And some claim the "get rich quick" theme that is so familiar. You can waste lots of money on these if YOU are not prepared to succeed, and many are not. YOU have to know what you want, what your dreams are and what you would do if they were realized. Otherwise, FEAR will take over and you will never follow through. If you are more comfortable on paper, in writing, then you can write your story the way you want it to be. And there are many others out there, I have only listed a few that I personally have checked out and have found helped me. If something strikes a chord with you, if it makes you excited...go for it! and follow through! If you are worried how you'll pay for it, believe that you will have the money somehow when you need it. Move forward towards your dream.

CONCLUSION
You can have your dream. You deserve it. You must prepare for it. Eliminate negative from your life. Don't let others draw you into their negative, fearful lives. It is all right to request that others around you not talk about negative things. Stop watching the news. Filter your news to stay informed but stop taking in all the negative, all the time. DREAM BIG!! ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!

AFFIRMATIONS

They do work. Perception is reality. I am healthy. I enjoy exercising every day. Every cell in my body is whole and vital. I easily maintain my perfect body weight. Believe it...Be it!