PREFACE
A new year. What joy will this year bring to me? Every day is a new chance for joy. Not just the first day of the new year. But we all see it and mark it as a new beginning.
STORY
This year brings along with it the old problems of the last two years, since #45 was put into the presidency. I resolved last year to "unplug" from the news on the weekends on Friday night and not watch the news again until Sunday night. This gives me a break from the non-stop dumpster fire that is the Trump presidency!
I am also still fighting the effects of PTSD, depression and anxiety, but the need to fight them is getting a little more infrequent. I have tried to start a running count of "days I haven't cried" but can't seem to get past 3 days. I am still broken.
I started a weight loss program in the beginning of November. I've lost 11 lbs, even through the holidays. I'm in my 14th week and I'm going to lose 60 lbs. I am tired of carrying around the extra weight. I'm tired of my joints aching. I'm tired of not being able to do things that I use to do with ease. I'm just tired! This program (Noom) is based online and aligns with my lifestyle. This will be a success!!
CONCLUSION
So with a new year, comes a new outlook. My one resolution this year will be to move forward.
Showing posts with label joy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label joy. Show all posts
Saturday, January 19, 2019
Sunday, January 03, 2016
Adventures in Flying! Happy New Year!
PREFACE
A happy, healthy, and prosperous New Year to you and yours! I had a wonderful time, once I got to Wisconsin. Adventures in flying! My flight was cancelled twice during my layover in Charlotte, N.C. and finally I was put on a flight to Dallas! and then flew into Madison, instead of Milwaukee. I left Ft. Lauderdale at 10 A.M. and didn't get into Madison until 11 P.M.! But it's all good.
STORY
There was 7 inches of new snow on the ground and I was very thankful for my sister's snow boots and gloves. The ceremony for my son, Ian, and his bride, Erin, was informal at the courthouse. There were local friends and family there. The bride and groom's mothers were the official witnesses (me and her mother). The vows made me cry and I had no tissues, of course. The judge was friendly and funny and the ceremony was moving. Then we all went to dinner. Good times!
CONCLUSION
My son and his new bride are starting the new year out as husband and wife. My own parents chose Dec. 31st as their wedding day. I think it is a nice repeat of a tradition. I can already see that they will be much happier than my parents were. They are much more in sync and have more commonality. They remind me of my marriage to Ian's father and the soul-mate, best friend bond that we had together for 20 years. It gives me a warm feeling in my heart and comfort that my son will have the kind of love that made him be possible. HAPPY, HEALTHY, & PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR! 2016!
A happy, healthy, and prosperous New Year to you and yours! I had a wonderful time, once I got to Wisconsin. Adventures in flying! My flight was cancelled twice during my layover in Charlotte, N.C. and finally I was put on a flight to Dallas! and then flew into Madison, instead of Milwaukee. I left Ft. Lauderdale at 10 A.M. and didn't get into Madison until 11 P.M.! But it's all good.
STORY
There was 7 inches of new snow on the ground and I was very thankful for my sister's snow boots and gloves. The ceremony for my son, Ian, and his bride, Erin, was informal at the courthouse. There were local friends and family there. The bride and groom's mothers were the official witnesses (me and her mother). The vows made me cry and I had no tissues, of course. The judge was friendly and funny and the ceremony was moving. Then we all went to dinner. Good times!
CONCLUSION
My son and his new bride are starting the new year out as husband and wife. My own parents chose Dec. 31st as their wedding day. I think it is a nice repeat of a tradition. I can already see that they will be much happier than my parents were. They are much more in sync and have more commonality. They remind me of my marriage to Ian's father and the soul-mate, best friend bond that we had together for 20 years. It gives me a warm feeling in my heart and comfort that my son will have the kind of love that made him be possible. HAPPY, HEALTHY, & PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR! 2016!
Monday, April 04, 2011
OUTBACK FOR BEGINNERS
PREFACE
I really am getting ahead of myself. I am about to get up from the computer, get dressed and drive 15 miles to Outback Steakhouse to meet yet another online contact. He is driving up from West Palm Beach (80 miles away!). I am treating this as casually as I can.
STORY
We met about a 3 weeks ago on this new site I just joined, BBPeopleMeet.com It is for people who are overweight or tall & overweight or men who like very curvy women. I have avoided this kind of online dating site because of some horror stories about Chubby Chasers (men who are borderline, and not so borderline, fetish or obsessed with overweight women). I prefer men who are average or athletic, even 30-40lbs over their optimum weight, but not obese. Reason being it makes for awkwardness in the bedroom, and sometimes downright a turn-off or impossibility. Two fat people trying to have sex can be very unsatisfying (at least in my experience).
CONCLUSION
I do like AM from our email exchanges and he has a pleasant voice on the phone. I am not turned on my the picture he has posted on his profile, and my gut feelings are that I am not expecting any sparks to fly. I am just expecting a pleasant meal and conversation for a change in my routine of late. I am hoping he is not expecting anything more than that. He invited me to dinner, but I will be honest with my impression and feelings for him...and then offer to pay for my meal. Stay tuned for more....
I really am getting ahead of myself. I am about to get up from the computer, get dressed and drive 15 miles to Outback Steakhouse to meet yet another online contact. He is driving up from West Palm Beach (80 miles away!). I am treating this as casually as I can.
STORY
We met about a 3 weeks ago on this new site I just joined, BBPeopleMeet.com It is for people who are overweight or tall & overweight or men who like very curvy women. I have avoided this kind of online dating site because of some horror stories about Chubby Chasers (men who are borderline, and not so borderline, fetish or obsessed with overweight women). I prefer men who are average or athletic, even 30-40lbs over their optimum weight, but not obese. Reason being it makes for awkwardness in the bedroom, and sometimes downright a turn-off or impossibility. Two fat people trying to have sex can be very unsatisfying (at least in my experience).
CONCLUSION
I do like AM from our email exchanges and he has a pleasant voice on the phone. I am not turned on my the picture he has posted on his profile, and my gut feelings are that I am not expecting any sparks to fly. I am just expecting a pleasant meal and conversation for a change in my routine of late. I am hoping he is not expecting anything more than that. He invited me to dinner, but I will be honest with my impression and feelings for him...and then offer to pay for my meal. Stay tuned for more....
Thursday, March 31, 2011
LOVE, MONEY, HEALTH & JOY
I was about to title this entry with NO in front of each word but stopped myself before attracting the opposite of what is desired. The Law of Attraction is restatement of positive thinking. Your mind does not hear the NO, NOT, NEVER. Always state things in the positive.
STORY
If you want NO pain, all your mind hears is PAIN. So you need to concentrate on PAINLESS or PAIN FREE. If you say "I don't want to leave" all your mind hears is "I want to leave" instead of saying "I want to stay and be happy." Negative thoughts are so much easier because we have been programmed by our environment, our parents, or spouses and friends...however well meaning they think they are. Being a positive thinker is hard work in some circumstances.
What we think is what will be. Thought is manifestation. I do believe that it all started with a thought...the BIG BANG...Creation...God. One thought...One idea. LOVE?
God lives within me, as me.
That which we think we are, we are. Everything that happens is of our own making. Our reality is of our own making.
CONCLUSION
Friday, July 30, 2010
UP AND RUNNING AGAIN...
PREFACE
Finally got paid! Ordered the power supply for Ye Ole Mac (bought c. 1999), all my supplements that I was out of, required book for online grad course, replacement batteries for PowerBook (Mac G4), and paid ALL my bills. YAY!
STORY
When the power supply burned out (with a loud POP!) last month, I was forced to buy a laptop to re-write my term paper just in time for the end of last semester. Luckily, I know a guy. A guy that turns out to be one of the GOOD guys! He sold me a G4 laptop (about 4 years old which in Mac years is brand new!) for $400. A bargain (but not an expense which I was prepared for) and I was thrilled to have it.
I lost all my work on my term paper but my professor allowed for the situation and gave me three days past deadline to turn it in, which I did. I passed the class but didn't earn a high enough grade to avoid having to appeal an "academic progress" hold on my financial aid. I won my appeal. I'm at the beginning of my fourth week of this semester.
Working as an adjunct professor, I only get paid at the end of the semester which means I work for 6-8 weeks with NO PAY. It requires some fancy financial juggling for someone who has been unemployed for over a year...to say the least. The unexpected need for a laptop put me behind the proverbial eightball financially. I ran out of almost half of my supplements for the last week and was about to buy groceries for my neighbor on my food stamp card in exchange for cash to buy gas to get to work, when my retro pay from unemployment came through. Then my paycheck was deposited, and I'm flush again.
CONCLUSION
I am so grateful that I have found peace with it all. I meditate and leave the worrying to God (or whatever higher power of your choice). Worry doesn't change anything. If you worry every minute of every waking day, it doesn't change the outcome of what you are worrying about. If you didn't worry at all, the same thing is going to happen. So why worry? It's a diamond-hard habit to break, but it is possible. You just let go.
My life is wonderful. It is going in the direction I want it to go. Things ARE working out the best for me. I deserve to be happy, to be healthy, to have abundance and to prosper, and that is what is happening. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. Peace & Joy!
Finally got paid! Ordered the power supply for Ye Ole Mac (bought c. 1999), all my supplements that I was out of, required book for online grad course, replacement batteries for PowerBook (Mac G4), and paid ALL my bills. YAY!
STORY
When the power supply burned out (with a loud POP!) last month, I was forced to buy a laptop to re-write my term paper just in time for the end of last semester. Luckily, I know a guy. A guy that turns out to be one of the GOOD guys! He sold me a G4 laptop (about 4 years old which in Mac years is brand new!) for $400. A bargain (but not an expense which I was prepared for) and I was thrilled to have it.
I lost all my work on my term paper but my professor allowed for the situation and gave me three days past deadline to turn it in, which I did. I passed the class but didn't earn a high enough grade to avoid having to appeal an "academic progress" hold on my financial aid. I won my appeal. I'm at the beginning of my fourth week of this semester.
Working as an adjunct professor, I only get paid at the end of the semester which means I work for 6-8 weeks with NO PAY. It requires some fancy financial juggling for someone who has been unemployed for over a year...to say the least. The unexpected need for a laptop put me behind the proverbial eightball financially. I ran out of almost half of my supplements for the last week and was about to buy groceries for my neighbor on my food stamp card in exchange for cash to buy gas to get to work, when my retro pay from unemployment came through. Then my paycheck was deposited, and I'm flush again.
CONCLUSION
I am so grateful that I have found peace with it all. I meditate and leave the worrying to God (or whatever higher power of your choice). Worry doesn't change anything. If you worry every minute of every waking day, it doesn't change the outcome of what you are worrying about. If you didn't worry at all, the same thing is going to happen. So why worry? It's a diamond-hard habit to break, but it is possible. You just let go.
My life is wonderful. It is going in the direction I want it to go. Things ARE working out the best for me. I deserve to be happy, to be healthy, to have abundance and to prosper, and that is what is happening. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. Peace & Joy!
Thursday, July 22, 2010
MOVIE MARATHON
PREFACE
Today I saw three movies in a row at the local theater. It's called "theater-hopping" when you pay for one ticket to see one movie but go into other movies without paying to see them. And while it may even be considered illegal, it's not enforced very often by the theater managers or staff. The reason is that theaters don't make very much money on ticket sales.
STORY
The first week or two the movie is shown, most or all of the money from ticket sales goes to the distributor of the film. One movie (with all its reels) can cost $10,000 for the theater to show and until that money is made, the theater doesn't make any profit. Think about the modern day multiplex theaters with 12-15-18-24 screens, showing multi-copies of several films and you can imagine the money invested. Some theaters are now showing older films at morning matinees for $1 admission...nostalgia movies at a nostalgia price. It still sells popcorn, candy, and soda!
Concession is where the money is made, (with a little $ from vending & game machines but not as much as in the past). I had a "combo special" between the first and second movies which consisted of two jumbo all-beef hotdogs and a VAT of ICEE (frozen slushy coke with free refills) and it cost me $14! I got in on a reduced weekday ticket rate of $4.75 and saw three movies. So I still saved about $8 on the deal.
Why do you think theater managers are so eager to give you passes when you don't like a movie? Unless you've never complained about a movie or wanted your money back for a disturbance in a movie...I guess you may not know that they want you to come back again and spend at the concession stand.
CONCLUSION
I saw Sorcerer's Apprentice, Despicable Me, and Inception...6 1/2 hours in a dark theater...thrills, humor, action, laughter, tears, confusion, intrigue, awesome effects. Well worth the investment of money and time. It gives me joy to watch movies. And I'm worth it!
Today I saw three movies in a row at the local theater. It's called "theater-hopping" when you pay for one ticket to see one movie but go into other movies without paying to see them. And while it may even be considered illegal, it's not enforced very often by the theater managers or staff. The reason is that theaters don't make very much money on ticket sales.
STORY
The first week or two the movie is shown, most or all of the money from ticket sales goes to the distributor of the film. One movie (with all its reels) can cost $10,000 for the theater to show and until that money is made, the theater doesn't make any profit. Think about the modern day multiplex theaters with 12-15-18-24 screens, showing multi-copies of several films and you can imagine the money invested. Some theaters are now showing older films at morning matinees for $1 admission...nostalgia movies at a nostalgia price. It still sells popcorn, candy, and soda!
Concession is where the money is made, (with a little $ from vending & game machines but not as much as in the past). I had a "combo special" between the first and second movies which consisted of two jumbo all-beef hotdogs and a VAT of ICEE (frozen slushy coke with free refills) and it cost me $14! I got in on a reduced weekday ticket rate of $4.75 and saw three movies. So I still saved about $8 on the deal.
Why do you think theater managers are so eager to give you passes when you don't like a movie? Unless you've never complained about a movie or wanted your money back for a disturbance in a movie...I guess you may not know that they want you to come back again and spend at the concession stand.
CONCLUSION
I saw Sorcerer's Apprentice, Despicable Me, and Inception...6 1/2 hours in a dark theater...thrills, humor, action, laughter, tears, confusion, intrigue, awesome effects. Well worth the investment of money and time. It gives me joy to watch movies. And I'm worth it!
Sunday, June 27, 2010
HE STAYED OVERNIGHT
PREFACE
So now my sleep pattern is in VAMPIRE MODE. The fiasco of the term paper last weekend and the end of teaching for Summer Term One left me with staying up all night until dawn, then going to sleep until after noon. I slept one day for 12 hours to catch up for an all-nighter in there someplace. Will I ever get back on schedule??
STORY
Friday night...up all night...Saturday AM, sun coming up, AGAIN! and I'm not in bed nor have I been since I got up at 4PM Friday afternoon. I try to go to sleep. I listen to my meditation CD...all 45 minutes of it...still awake. I sent a text to my married lover WS to ask if he's going to come by to see me today. It's 7AM and I don't even know if he's awake or if his wife will intercept the message, or give him a hard time about it. Then I get a text back, he's in pain, can't hardly walk...don't think he'll be coming by. I sent him good thoughts and well wishes...back and forth...kiss, kiss...feel better.
I couldn't sleep so I got up and mowed the back yard. Or at least a third of it. It's so tall that I can't get through it all at once. Have to stop after 20 minutes and let the mower cool down so I can hose down the blades! It's going to take me DAYS to get it under control again.
There's a rabbit sitting by the 'wild patch' in the back corner. He doesn't move when I mow (within 8 feet of him). Now I notice there's another one about two feet from him, hunched down into the tall grass. They must have a brood in the brush and are standing vigil to protect them as best they can. How brave...and dedicated.
It's now noon and way too hot to mow again today until sunset, so I go to bed and finally to sleep. I set the alarm for 7:30PM (it gets dark at almost 9 now). It goes off and I get dressed and go out to mow again. I get another third mowed before it starts to rain. Back inside the cool AC and standing under the vent to get my body temperature back down to normal...the phone rings. It's WS and he's feeling better. He sent me text messages that I didn't answer. I told him I was mowing. 9:30...he is already in bed, but wants to see me...I want to see him...he'll be here in 45 minutes...perfect! time for me to cook dinner and shower (timed just right when he arrives!). He joins me in the shower and we have hot sex. It overworks his hip and he's in pain again.
Once I realize he has sciatica, I rub on some BioFreeze and we relax on the couch to watch the comedian shows and munch on dinner. His wife and kids are all gone away up north, so he says "I'll stay tonight"...(wow, all night...a first). WS is one of the few men that I can actually SLEEP in the same bed with, a rarity. Sex is easy, sleeping in the same bed is a difficult 'dance' to master.
CONCLUSION
It was new and different to have WS stay the night. I got about four hours sleep total. When BT is here, I get very little sleep. I spoon with both men, but I'm more comfortable with WS. What is that? I can't explain it. Maybe because BT is single, I only see him 1-2 times a year, and I don't want to miss a single minute?! Is it just me or do all women have trouble sleeping with their lovers? How is it that men can just fall asleep? Maybe if I climaxed every time I had sex, I could just fall asleep too. No...it would have to be more than just once. I am energized after the first one. Somewhere around the third or fourth one...yeah, then I could sleep! LOL
So now my sleep pattern is in VAMPIRE MODE. The fiasco of the term paper last weekend and the end of teaching for Summer Term One left me with staying up all night until dawn, then going to sleep until after noon. I slept one day for 12 hours to catch up for an all-nighter in there someplace. Will I ever get back on schedule??
STORY
Friday night...up all night...Saturday AM, sun coming up, AGAIN! and I'm not in bed nor have I been since I got up at 4PM Friday afternoon. I try to go to sleep. I listen to my meditation CD...all 45 minutes of it...still awake. I sent a text to my married lover WS to ask if he's going to come by to see me today. It's 7AM and I don't even know if he's awake or if his wife will intercept the message, or give him a hard time about it. Then I get a text back, he's in pain, can't hardly walk...don't think he'll be coming by. I sent him good thoughts and well wishes...back and forth...kiss, kiss...feel better.
I couldn't sleep so I got up and mowed the back yard. Or at least a third of it. It's so tall that I can't get through it all at once. Have to stop after 20 minutes and let the mower cool down so I can hose down the blades! It's going to take me DAYS to get it under control again.
There's a rabbit sitting by the 'wild patch' in the back corner. He doesn't move when I mow (within 8 feet of him). Now I notice there's another one about two feet from him, hunched down into the tall grass. They must have a brood in the brush and are standing vigil to protect them as best they can. How brave...and dedicated.
It's now noon and way too hot to mow again today until sunset, so I go to bed and finally to sleep. I set the alarm for 7:30PM (it gets dark at almost 9 now). It goes off and I get dressed and go out to mow again. I get another third mowed before it starts to rain. Back inside the cool AC and standing under the vent to get my body temperature back down to normal...the phone rings. It's WS and he's feeling better. He sent me text messages that I didn't answer. I told him I was mowing. 9:30...he is already in bed, but wants to see me...I want to see him...he'll be here in 45 minutes...perfect! time for me to cook dinner and shower (timed just right when he arrives!). He joins me in the shower and we have hot sex. It overworks his hip and he's in pain again.
Once I realize he has sciatica, I rub on some BioFreeze and we relax on the couch to watch the comedian shows and munch on dinner. His wife and kids are all gone away up north, so he says "I'll stay tonight"...(wow, all night...a first). WS is one of the few men that I can actually SLEEP in the same bed with, a rarity. Sex is easy, sleeping in the same bed is a difficult 'dance' to master.
CONCLUSION
It was new and different to have WS stay the night. I got about four hours sleep total. When BT is here, I get very little sleep. I spoon with both men, but I'm more comfortable with WS. What is that? I can't explain it. Maybe because BT is single, I only see him 1-2 times a year, and I don't want to miss a single minute?! Is it just me or do all women have trouble sleeping with their lovers? How is it that men can just fall asleep? Maybe if I climaxed every time I had sex, I could just fall asleep too. No...it would have to be more than just once. I am energized after the first one. Somewhere around the third or fourth one...yeah, then I could sleep! LOL
Saturday, June 05, 2010
SATURDAY AFTERNOON DELIGHT
PREFACE
Still not done with my rough draft for my term paper. Running out of time...to be on time. What better way to celebrate than to take the afternoon off and have sex?
STORY
I sent a text message to my married lover on Saturday morning to ask if I was going to see him. He answered "yes & it wud be nice 2 catch u comng out of d shwr" and I said that depended on how he timed his arrival. To prepare for an afternoon of sex, I mowed the front lawn. Weird, you say? Not when you consider that it was a week past due and it rained every day. (June in south Florida!) If you didn't time it right, you could be caught in a downpour; mow at a daily temperature that competes with the surface temperature of the sun; or try to mow when the grass is too high or too wet, thus having to stop every 15 minutes to wash down the blades. Last weekend's mowing was delayed by my visit from BT. I had to catch up.
I timed it just right...finishing the front lawn while the clouds were gathering and cooled the temperature some...stepped into the shower, washed, shampooed, and shaved some stubble while the conditioner softened my hair. I thought I saw some movement in the living room (without glasses I can only see clearly about 3 inches in front of my eyes)...and into the bathroom he walks in all his naked glory. WS has a very sexy body...thin, but not skinny, and muscular...with a dark, Latino color, even where he is NOT tanned from working outside.
I invited him into the shower with me and we washed each other, kissed, and then got busy. I think the shower is one of THE most sensual places to have sex, and the fact that WS is just the height that we can do it standing up is the sexiest! Pure joy! We moved into the cool, dark bedroom and continued for some time, taking turns, bringing our pleasure to the peak then slowing down, changing position. Just as I was getting to the edge (which doesn't happen often in the natural scheme of things), I thought of introducing my 'finger vibrator' to the action to help me along. It actually intensified things for him too much...but he helped me along after and we both had mutually satisfying sex. We spooned and fell asleep for 20 minutes or so...a cat nap, then we dressed and hung out...talking, looking up stuff on the computer. I enjoy talking to him about spirituality, science, dreams, and goals...and everything. His phone rang and he had to go, promising to see me a few days (mmmm, goody!).
CONCLUSION
I have been meditating twice a day for a while now. One area I've needed improvement in is my love/sex life. The manifesting is paying off with a visit from BT (a love in my life) and now WS (the fairly regular sex in my life) and a very satisfying and joyfully tiring afternoon. Namaste!
Still not done with my rough draft for my term paper. Running out of time...to be on time. What better way to celebrate than to take the afternoon off and have sex?
STORY
I sent a text message to my married lover on Saturday morning to ask if I was going to see him. He answered "yes & it wud be nice 2 catch u comng out of d shwr" and I said that depended on how he timed his arrival. To prepare for an afternoon of sex, I mowed the front lawn. Weird, you say? Not when you consider that it was a week past due and it rained every day. (June in south Florida!) If you didn't time it right, you could be caught in a downpour; mow at a daily temperature that competes with the surface temperature of the sun; or try to mow when the grass is too high or too wet, thus having to stop every 15 minutes to wash down the blades. Last weekend's mowing was delayed by my visit from BT. I had to catch up.
I timed it just right...finishing the front lawn while the clouds were gathering and cooled the temperature some...stepped into the shower, washed, shampooed, and shaved some stubble while the conditioner softened my hair. I thought I saw some movement in the living room (without glasses I can only see clearly about 3 inches in front of my eyes)...and into the bathroom he walks in all his naked glory. WS has a very sexy body...thin, but not skinny, and muscular...with a dark, Latino color, even where he is NOT tanned from working outside.
I invited him into the shower with me and we washed each other, kissed, and then got busy. I think the shower is one of THE most sensual places to have sex, and the fact that WS is just the height that we can do it standing up is the sexiest! Pure joy! We moved into the cool, dark bedroom and continued for some time, taking turns, bringing our pleasure to the peak then slowing down, changing position. Just as I was getting to the edge (which doesn't happen often in the natural scheme of things), I thought of introducing my 'finger vibrator' to the action to help me along. It actually intensified things for him too much...but he helped me along after and we both had mutually satisfying sex. We spooned and fell asleep for 20 minutes or so...a cat nap, then we dressed and hung out...talking, looking up stuff on the computer. I enjoy talking to him about spirituality, science, dreams, and goals...and everything. His phone rang and he had to go, promising to see me a few days (mmmm, goody!).
CONCLUSION
I have been meditating twice a day for a while now. One area I've needed improvement in is my love/sex life. The manifesting is paying off with a visit from BT (a love in my life) and now WS (the fairly regular sex in my life) and a very satisfying and joyfully tiring afternoon. Namaste!
Tuesday, June 01, 2010
LAST MINUTE, LONG-DISTANCE MAN
PREFACE
He instant messaged me, "You still love me enough to see me this weekend?" I answered, "Of course"...and then asked lots of questions...when, where, how long a stay...this was the day before a three-day weekend (Memorial Day weekend). My long-distance love was coming to visit after almost a year.
STORY
BT (54) lives in the DR and is the GM for a printing plant. Until about a week ago, he had been working for the same company for 8 years. They had finally screwed him over enough and he gave notice but not before making plans to have another job to step into, doing the same thing, in the same area, for a better company. A company that will put his old company out of business. He has a good business brain, and the rest of him is pretty awesome too(!).
SUNDAY: He flew into MIA and drove the 3 hours up to me and finally arrived late Sunday afternoon. Since my car is on its last legs, I hadn't made any plans to drive to Lauderdale to celebrate with family and friends so I was available for this tryst. It was a pleasant surprise and a wonderful 36 hours. He and I went to my bedroom almost immediately, our clothes fell off, and we got re-acquainted! We re-acquainted ourselves on Sunday afternoon/evening twice. It was 9:30PM before we knew it and all the local restaurants closed by then, even on a holiday weekend. So we ordered pizza delivery and watched a movie while we ate.
MONDAY: morning, we had sex again. I made us breakfast and we ate. Later that morning, BT asked what I'd like to do? I said I thought staying here and having sex would be just fine with me unless he had something else in mind he'd like to do. He said that would be fine with him too. :)
We talked about his plans and what happened with his old company. He said that he would be coming to Florida more now with the new job. More like 2-3 times a year, instead of once or twice. Well, any improvement would be welcome. I do love him and as a lover, he's exciting, sensual, determined, generous, patient...and appreciates me for me. Leftover pizza for lunch.
We did take a drive to the beach house. I wanted to show it to him and we needed to go out for an errand anyway. It was a pleasant drive down US1 to Wabasso, then across Rt510 to A1A and north up the beach highway. The house on Amberson Beach was still for rent and the owners weren't visiting. We peeped in through the front door and then went around the back and up the boardwalk to the beach. It was glorious being there with him, sharing my vision for the house as an artist's retreat (& Bed and Breakfast). He liked it and my ideas. We returned to my house and cuddled. I cooked dinner, we ate, watched two movies. Even though he got a monster headache and wasn't up to any sex, it was nice having him there...being with him. I let him nap with his head in my lap and I massaged his head and neck. Cared for him. We went to bed and 'spooned' all night. I don't get much sleep when he visits, since it's much easier to have sex with a man than to sleep with him. I'm just not use to it (but I love to hear him purr/snore).
TUESDAY: We showered together @ 5AM after he shaved (his head, and face-not covered with goatee). I love showering with him. He apologized for not feeling up to sex and I said it was fine. He also realized that it was caused by not having his traction gear for his neck for the past two days. It stretches his neck and he's had almost no headaches since he started using it. Then he quipped that he was aiming for 6' (he's 5'10" now)...I laughed and said that was a reachable goal.
I made him toast and coffee, we kissed one last time, and then he was off to Miami for his meeting at 9AM. He said, "love you" and I said, "I love you too," and watched him back out of the driveway and drive away down the street. All too soon.
CONCLUSION
If my sex life is to be made up of more than one man, BT certainly fills the 'being in love with no commitment' section. He sees it as Friends With Benefits and I've now started to accept that as all there is going to be. The more I see him, the more I realize that what we have, is what we have. I don't expect anything more of it. And I don't think I want anything more from it.
I continue to search...with the freedom to do so. I like that, and I get great joy from being with and seeing BT. I grab all the joy I can in my life, as it comes along.
He instant messaged me, "You still love me enough to see me this weekend?" I answered, "Of course"...and then asked lots of questions...when, where, how long a stay...this was the day before a three-day weekend (Memorial Day weekend). My long-distance love was coming to visit after almost a year.
STORY
BT (54) lives in the DR and is the GM for a printing plant. Until about a week ago, he had been working for the same company for 8 years. They had finally screwed him over enough and he gave notice but not before making plans to have another job to step into, doing the same thing, in the same area, for a better company. A company that will put his old company out of business. He has a good business brain, and the rest of him is pretty awesome too(!).
SUNDAY: He flew into MIA and drove the 3 hours up to me and finally arrived late Sunday afternoon. Since my car is on its last legs, I hadn't made any plans to drive to Lauderdale to celebrate with family and friends so I was available for this tryst. It was a pleasant surprise and a wonderful 36 hours. He and I went to my bedroom almost immediately, our clothes fell off, and we got re-acquainted! We re-acquainted ourselves on Sunday afternoon/evening twice. It was 9:30PM before we knew it and all the local restaurants closed by then, even on a holiday weekend. So we ordered pizza delivery and watched a movie while we ate.
MONDAY: morning, we had sex again. I made us breakfast and we ate. Later that morning, BT asked what I'd like to do? I said I thought staying here and having sex would be just fine with me unless he had something else in mind he'd like to do. He said that would be fine with him too. :)
We talked about his plans and what happened with his old company. He said that he would be coming to Florida more now with the new job. More like 2-3 times a year, instead of once or twice. Well, any improvement would be welcome. I do love him and as a lover, he's exciting, sensual, determined, generous, patient...and appreciates me for me. Leftover pizza for lunch.
We did take a drive to the beach house. I wanted to show it to him and we needed to go out for an errand anyway. It was a pleasant drive down US1 to Wabasso, then across Rt510 to A1A and north up the beach highway. The house on Amberson Beach was still for rent and the owners weren't visiting. We peeped in through the front door and then went around the back and up the boardwalk to the beach. It was glorious being there with him, sharing my vision for the house as an artist's retreat (& Bed and Breakfast). He liked it and my ideas. We returned to my house and cuddled. I cooked dinner, we ate, watched two movies. Even though he got a monster headache and wasn't up to any sex, it was nice having him there...being with him. I let him nap with his head in my lap and I massaged his head and neck. Cared for him. We went to bed and 'spooned' all night. I don't get much sleep when he visits, since it's much easier to have sex with a man than to sleep with him. I'm just not use to it (but I love to hear him purr/snore).
TUESDAY: We showered together @ 5AM after he shaved (his head, and face-not covered with goatee). I love showering with him. He apologized for not feeling up to sex and I said it was fine. He also realized that it was caused by not having his traction gear for his neck for the past two days. It stretches his neck and he's had almost no headaches since he started using it. Then he quipped that he was aiming for 6' (he's 5'10" now)...I laughed and said that was a reachable goal.
I made him toast and coffee, we kissed one last time, and then he was off to Miami for his meeting at 9AM. He said, "love you" and I said, "I love you too," and watched him back out of the driveway and drive away down the street. All too soon.
CONCLUSION
If my sex life is to be made up of more than one man, BT certainly fills the 'being in love with no commitment' section. He sees it as Friends With Benefits and I've now started to accept that as all there is going to be. The more I see him, the more I realize that what we have, is what we have. I don't expect anything more of it. And I don't think I want anything more from it.
I continue to search...with the freedom to do so. I like that, and I get great joy from being with and seeing BT. I grab all the joy I can in my life, as it comes along.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
SUMMER SCHOOL! YAY!
PREFACE
Hurray for me! I got a class to teach for Summer Term A. I'll be teaching Photoshop Level 1 for six weeks. The class is Tuesday and Thursday 6-9PM, perfect for me (!). It's on the main campus, Ft. Pierce, which is a 30 mile drive (less than it was for Davie-Boca Raton). This is just the beginning.
STORY
The head of the graphic design dept. is really thrilled to have me teaching with them. And it is such a joy for me to be back teaching. The college is about to become a four year institution and they will need lots of instructors that know what it's all about. I just wish I had my MFA and I may have come up with a way to get it. I only have two more semesters (if I take 8 credits each) and I could have my degree. The degree with Capella will take me two years to complete and won't give me the degree I really need to become permanent, but would let them at least hire me full time. It is a dilemma.
CONCLUSION
I will have to wait and see if I get a reliable car in the next month or so. If I do, then I can think about commuting to Boca for my MFA. Since I've worked out a lease with Gino & Lou to be able to stay until October 31st, I'm a little more grounded in making plans. Everything just keeps working out for me. I'm very grateful and I continue to meditate and manifest. Outrageous Mastery!!
Hurray for me! I got a class to teach for Summer Term A. I'll be teaching Photoshop Level 1 for six weeks. The class is Tuesday and Thursday 6-9PM, perfect for me (!). It's on the main campus, Ft. Pierce, which is a 30 mile drive (less than it was for Davie-Boca Raton). This is just the beginning.
STORY
The head of the graphic design dept. is really thrilled to have me teaching with them. And it is such a joy for me to be back teaching. The college is about to become a four year institution and they will need lots of instructors that know what it's all about. I just wish I had my MFA and I may have come up with a way to get it. I only have two more semesters (if I take 8 credits each) and I could have my degree. The degree with Capella will take me two years to complete and won't give me the degree I really need to become permanent, but would let them at least hire me full time. It is a dilemma.
CONCLUSION
I will have to wait and see if I get a reliable car in the next month or so. If I do, then I can think about commuting to Boca for my MFA. Since I've worked out a lease with Gino & Lou to be able to stay until October 31st, I'm a little more grounded in making plans. Everything just keeps working out for me. I'm very grateful and I continue to meditate and manifest. Outrageous Mastery!!
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